Every time i think of you
I feel shot right through with a bolt of blue
It's no problem of mine
but it's a problem I find
Living a life that I can't leave behind
There's no sense in telling me
The wisdom of a fool won't set you free
But that's the way that it goes
And it's what nobody knows
While every day my confusion grows
Every time I see you falling
I get down on my knees and pray
I'm waiting for that final moment
You'll say the words that I can't say
Now i know, now i really know.
ever waited for something. that never came? that feeling that start's with a fool's hope, kept alive by rising uncertainty and finally extinguished by utter disbelief and disappoinment?
Yeah, i thought so too.
all that was needed was a single nod, a subtle change in body language, a certain look from the eye. just to confirm that a message was indeed received.
but no.
it is felt that silence is the right way while you stand there waiting for something that'll never come.
but i have one thing to say, Dont ever say things that you dont mean and make promises you cant fucking keep.
this time the joke's on me.
Sunday, February 27, 2005
Wednesday, February 23, 2005
Here's a quick peek at some of the msn nicks that caught my eye:
the way i want you makes me fear you
the worst things are those who linger outside our lives, not coming in, not diappearing.
overworked, underpaid and exhausted
insecured..
when a lie could be dangerous, ignorance is bliss
suicidal tendencies
maybe i'm a winner playing a losing game
dead
loser
official lost of brain
is it me or is the world getting all old and cynical? whatever happened to love, life and everything that is worth fighting for?
Anyway here's one that really did it for me.
lump of tummy
YEAH. go figure.
the way i want you makes me fear you
the worst things are those who linger outside our lives, not coming in, not diappearing.
overworked, underpaid and exhausted
insecured..
when a lie could be dangerous, ignorance is bliss
suicidal tendencies
maybe i'm a winner playing a losing game
dead
loser
official lost of brain
is it me or is the world getting all old and cynical? whatever happened to love, life and everything that is worth fighting for?
Anyway here's one that really did it for me.
lump of tummy
YEAH. go figure.
Friday, February 18, 2005
i hate this self-imposed self-censorship. the only area of expression is facing so much restrictions that at the end of the day, nothing is vented at all. which begs the question, then why have something online where everybody can access to it?
i guess i'm just an attentionseeking whore deep down inside.
somethings never do change do they?
never
i guess i'm just an attentionseeking whore deep down inside.
somethings never do change do they?
never
Thursday, February 17, 2005
The one with Eva Longoria
i remembered watching one of the earlier episode of friends where Rachel and Ross were together. Monica has just broken up with that old doctor (forgot the name) and was sulking her days away. Ross and Rachel were in bed and Rachel grilled Ross about his deepest fantasy. Ross confessed.
It was Princess Leia in her gold bikini.
Subsequently, Pheebs and Mon got to know it and poked fun at Ross's fantasy. Frustrated and confused, Ross confronted Rachel about this. Rachel said of course the girls know because apparently girls share EVERYTHING.
Yes Everything. Even your size and performance.
Anyway, i digress.
So Ross thought that this sharing sisterhood thing was meaningful. he told chandler about it and they agreed to share some deep dark secrets with each other.
"have you ever experienced while you were doing it and everything was going great. but while you're in the heat of things, suddenly the face of your mum appears out of nowhere in your mind and no matter how you try you cant shake off that image?" said chandler (he said something in this sense)
"oh my god!" said Ross and ran out of central perks.
that night, Rachel decided to fulfill Ross's fantasy and came to bed dressed in a gold bikini with the princess leia hairdo. you'd have thought that upon seeing Rachel, Ross would have been overwhelmed with lust.
unfortunately no.
chandler's sick words played on his mind and what he saw wasnt rachel in a gold bikini.
what he saw was his MOM in a gold bikini.
and needless to say, he went to bed traumatised and with a seething rachel beside him.
*aaargh
i remembered watching one of the earlier episode of friends where Rachel and Ross were together. Monica has just broken up with that old doctor (forgot the name) and was sulking her days away. Ross and Rachel were in bed and Rachel grilled Ross about his deepest fantasy. Ross confessed.
It was Princess Leia in her gold bikini.
Subsequently, Pheebs and Mon got to know it and poked fun at Ross's fantasy. Frustrated and confused, Ross confronted Rachel about this. Rachel said of course the girls know because apparently girls share EVERYTHING.
Yes Everything. Even your size and performance.
Anyway, i digress.
So Ross thought that this sharing sisterhood thing was meaningful. he told chandler about it and they agreed to share some deep dark secrets with each other.
"have you ever experienced while you were doing it and everything was going great. but while you're in the heat of things, suddenly the face of your mum appears out of nowhere in your mind and no matter how you try you cant shake off that image?" said chandler (he said something in this sense)
"oh my god!" said Ross and ran out of central perks.
that night, Rachel decided to fulfill Ross's fantasy and came to bed dressed in a gold bikini with the princess leia hairdo. you'd have thought that upon seeing Rachel, Ross would have been overwhelmed with lust.
unfortunately no.
chandler's sick words played on his mind and what he saw wasnt rachel in a gold bikini.
what he saw was his MOM in a gold bikini.
and needless to say, he went to bed traumatised and with a seething rachel beside him.
*aaargh
Tuesday, February 15, 2005
Things have gone out of hand
i heard from somewhere that we should never post/publish/send stuff that we have just written when we are emotionally charged or unstable. it is believed that we will regret what we say in time to come.
but i say fuck that.
well, i didnt feel any sudden remorse and regret coursing through my veins and assaulting my brain. so i guess it is safe to continue. once in awhile, people will say something that will trigger something so deep inside you that you will go shooting through the roof in fury.
fury. white hot molten anger blinding me with frightening speed. i need to strike out. sometimes all you can do is gawk at the absolute and downright naivety and stupidity at the logic (the lack of it) people possess.
i know attraction cannot be explained in a logical way. but i know downright stubborness and tunnel vision when i see it. the parties involved are more than you can handle. when all is said and done, you will leave a path of destruction in your wake. do you want this to hang over you for the rest of your life?
the apparent nonchalance and ignorance is pissing me off. maybe i am of no right to comment because i cannot really see from your point of view. but to leave them in the dark..
disappointment. utter disappointment. and i'll just leave it at that.
how the hell did all these happen?
and i have the perfect word to describe it all.
fuck.
on a more calmer issue, i know things were done with the best intentions. i dont fault that but i feel there could have been a better way. but what's done is done so lets move on. but please no hanky panky behind my back anymore.
*please
i heard from somewhere that we should never post/publish/send stuff that we have just written when we are emotionally charged or unstable. it is believed that we will regret what we say in time to come.
but i say fuck that.
well, i didnt feel any sudden remorse and regret coursing through my veins and assaulting my brain. so i guess it is safe to continue. once in awhile, people will say something that will trigger something so deep inside you that you will go shooting through the roof in fury.
fury. white hot molten anger blinding me with frightening speed. i need to strike out. sometimes all you can do is gawk at the absolute and downright naivety and stupidity at the logic (the lack of it) people possess.
i know attraction cannot be explained in a logical way. but i know downright stubborness and tunnel vision when i see it. the parties involved are more than you can handle. when all is said and done, you will leave a path of destruction in your wake. do you want this to hang over you for the rest of your life?
the apparent nonchalance and ignorance is pissing me off. maybe i am of no right to comment because i cannot really see from your point of view. but to leave them in the dark..
disappointment. utter disappointment. and i'll just leave it at that.
how the hell did all these happen?
and i have the perfect word to describe it all.
fuck.
on a more calmer issue, i know things were done with the best intentions. i dont fault that but i feel there could have been a better way. but what's done is done so lets move on. but please no hanky panky behind my back anymore.
*please
Tuesday, February 08, 2005
and i understand
i guess it's time for me to return
to the place where it all begun
to the beginning
where reality and fantasy
weaved into one
a place where my past
was nothing but a dream
watching at your half-hearted attempt on humour
the laughter that never quite reached your eyes
you feel so faraway
that i cant reach for you anymore
and i understand
the subtle way
you no longer reach for my hand
and use the shampoo
that i have come to love
and i understand
how you would
look away
when i tried to
wade through the endless abyss
within your eyes
and i understand
why at this moment
you are holding my hand
so tightly it hurts
telling me words
that we once
promised
never to say to
each other
and i understand
the reason why
i am listening close
to every single word
you utter
as if they were your last
because
i know
it will be your last.
and i understand, i understand.
as the first light dawns, it signals the end
to everything.
i guess it's time for me to return
to the place where it all begun
to the beginning
where reality and fantasy
weaved into one
a place where my past
was nothing but a dream
watching at your half-hearted attempt on humour
the laughter that never quite reached your eyes
you feel so faraway
that i cant reach for you anymore
and i understand
the subtle way
you no longer reach for my hand
and use the shampoo
that i have come to love
and i understand
how you would
look away
when i tried to
wade through the endless abyss
within your eyes
and i understand
why at this moment
you are holding my hand
so tightly it hurts
telling me words
that we once
promised
never to say to
each other
and i understand
the reason why
i am listening close
to every single word
you utter
as if they were your last
because
i know
it will be your last.
and i understand, i understand.
as the first light dawns, it signals the end
to everything.
Tuesday, February 01, 2005
Spirited Away
one day i would be able to master all the languages in the world and speak like natives. and armed with nothing but a little hope, i would backpack across the world to places that i never dreamed existed. i would sail across the altantic where the vast expanse of water will invoke feelings that i never experienced. and when the sun sets at dusk, the array of colours and breathtaking display across the horizon will assault my senses. as i close my eyes, i can feel and hear the wind against my face, the sensations no written word can explain. a smile plays along my lips and at that moment, freedom is defined. magical
i would travel the world and learn about cultures i never heard of. i will speak with the natives in their own tongue, learn how to do the rain dance and how to make medincine with plants that have yet to be discovered . not because i crave their acceptance but just so because i respect their way of life. i would travel from the sleazy backstreets of amsterdam to the majestic scenery that is new zealand. i will learn to ski at the swiss alps. my footsteps will bring me to the Sacri Monti of Piedmont and Lombardy where a fusion of sheer artistry, skill and a landscape of moutains, lakes and forests, take my breath away. milan will no longer be just a legend but an everlasting memory.
walking along the tagus river of Lisbon, the city is filled with houses whose facades are decked in ceramic tiles. as nighttime descends, the sound of traditional Fado songs are heard across the warmth of homes. cairo will be the next stop, the place where pharoahs once rule and now they reside in majestic and skilled skyscrapers that are called pyramids.
My weary feet will bring me to the land where religions were claimed to be originated. i would visit the dead sea and see if everything floats. i would step foot on Jerusalem, a place so filled with history and legend but at the same time not spared of bloodshed and violence in the battle of 'religious' supremacy.
France will be a stop that i will never miss. if it was possible, i would take as long as it takes to travel the whole of France, from Lille at the north all the way to montpellier at the south coast. i would be sure to be at Marseille, the oldest city of France and immerse myself in the rustic charm of hills and sea. who can forget Paris, the city of romance and untold possibilities? i would attempt to take the stairs up the Eiffel Tower and drink in the wonderful sights that will wash over me. at night, i will watch in dreamy wonder as the guardian of Paris is illuminated with golden beacons of light can be seen from the rooftop. it would be sheer magic. i want to get lost as i walk along the streets of Champ Elysees, walking from avenue to avenue, speechless by the sheer fairytale quality of everything. when i'm tired, i will walk into a coffeeshop by the street and have a latte with croissant and wink at every blue eyed girl that looks my way.
Finally, the time will come when everything has to end. i will find myself a land that is off a cliff and overlooking the sea. sunrise and sunset are nothing but just a brief look away. and when the night comes, the moonlight will illuminate the house making it glow at night.
how unbelievably mythical and magical.
*take me away from all these shit
one day i would be able to master all the languages in the world and speak like natives. and armed with nothing but a little hope, i would backpack across the world to places that i never dreamed existed. i would sail across the altantic where the vast expanse of water will invoke feelings that i never experienced. and when the sun sets at dusk, the array of colours and breathtaking display across the horizon will assault my senses. as i close my eyes, i can feel and hear the wind against my face, the sensations no written word can explain. a smile plays along my lips and at that moment, freedom is defined. magical
i would travel the world and learn about cultures i never heard of. i will speak with the natives in their own tongue, learn how to do the rain dance and how to make medincine with plants that have yet to be discovered . not because i crave their acceptance but just so because i respect their way of life. i would travel from the sleazy backstreets of amsterdam to the majestic scenery that is new zealand. i will learn to ski at the swiss alps. my footsteps will bring me to the Sacri Monti of Piedmont and Lombardy where a fusion of sheer artistry, skill and a landscape of moutains, lakes and forests, take my breath away. milan will no longer be just a legend but an everlasting memory.
walking along the tagus river of Lisbon, the city is filled with houses whose facades are decked in ceramic tiles. as nighttime descends, the sound of traditional Fado songs are heard across the warmth of homes. cairo will be the next stop, the place where pharoahs once rule and now they reside in majestic and skilled skyscrapers that are called pyramids.
My weary feet will bring me to the land where religions were claimed to be originated. i would visit the dead sea and see if everything floats. i would step foot on Jerusalem, a place so filled with history and legend but at the same time not spared of bloodshed and violence in the battle of 'religious' supremacy.
France will be a stop that i will never miss. if it was possible, i would take as long as it takes to travel the whole of France, from Lille at the north all the way to montpellier at the south coast. i would be sure to be at Marseille, the oldest city of France and immerse myself in the rustic charm of hills and sea. who can forget Paris, the city of romance and untold possibilities? i would attempt to take the stairs up the Eiffel Tower and drink in the wonderful sights that will wash over me. at night, i will watch in dreamy wonder as the guardian of Paris is illuminated with golden beacons of light can be seen from the rooftop. it would be sheer magic. i want to get lost as i walk along the streets of Champ Elysees, walking from avenue to avenue, speechless by the sheer fairytale quality of everything. when i'm tired, i will walk into a coffeeshop by the street and have a latte with croissant and wink at every blue eyed girl that looks my way.
Finally, the time will come when everything has to end. i will find myself a land that is off a cliff and overlooking the sea. sunrise and sunset are nothing but just a brief look away. and when the night comes, the moonlight will illuminate the house making it glow at night.
how unbelievably mythical and magical.
*take me away from all these shit
Saturday, January 29, 2005
The calm before the storm
there's so much to say but yet at the same time there's nothing left to say. an obvious contradiction i know. but isnt life itself one huge contradiction?
i am weary of the weight of time.
the process of time has wore away the walls that you can find comfort in. expectations has took away the cool detachment that you so craved for and cherished. they say you dont make enough decisons but when you do make them. they are greeted with scorn and disinterest. people have led you to believe but you dscover everything was just an elaborate lie. a scam to make you sink deeper than you once were.
you thought, you assumed, you even dared to believe and therefore you will suffer.
and now here you are, in the abyss of nothingness. the silence mocking, the darkness complete and the damage total. and you know it's nobody's fault but your own.
i dont feel like going on anymore
滴下的眼泪已停不住了
there's so much to say but yet at the same time there's nothing left to say. an obvious contradiction i know. but isnt life itself one huge contradiction?
i am weary of the weight of time.
the process of time has wore away the walls that you can find comfort in. expectations has took away the cool detachment that you so craved for and cherished. they say you dont make enough decisons but when you do make them. they are greeted with scorn and disinterest. people have led you to believe but you dscover everything was just an elaborate lie. a scam to make you sink deeper than you once were.
you thought, you assumed, you even dared to believe and therefore you will suffer.
and now here you are, in the abyss of nothingness. the silence mocking, the darkness complete and the damage total. and you know it's nobody's fault but your own.
i dont feel like going on anymore
滴下的眼泪已停不住了
Tuesday, January 25, 2005
in the depths of silence, my mind follows the fading light with hopeless abandon. the signs of a broken life engulf me. the silence is deafening, mocking me to the deepest recesses of my soul. i wipe away the telltale emotions that have escaped my eyes. there is just no other way to begin.
I HATE FINANCE
oh and on a lighter note, i think Eva Longoria is FHOT.
I HATE FINANCE
oh and on a lighter note, i think Eva Longoria is FHOT.
Friday, January 14, 2005
resurrected this from one of the previous posts. it still stands true.
some people just pretend they know me so damn well when they dont
some people just pretend they are so damn close to me when they are not
some people are just so misconstrued to think they are so damn close to me and they know me so damn well to even start judging me
but i am telling you
GET REAL and listen.
stop fucking judge me and telling me what to do.
because you wont if you really know me that well as you thought.
we flatter those we hardly know
we please the fleeting guest
and deal full many a thoughless blow
to those who love us best.
some people just pretend they know me so damn well when they dont
some people just pretend they are so damn close to me when they are not
some people are just so misconstrued to think they are so damn close to me and they know me so damn well to even start judging me
but i am telling you
GET REAL and listen.
stop fucking judge me and telling me what to do.
because you wont if you really know me that well as you thought.
we flatter those we hardly know
we please the fleeting guest
and deal full many a thoughless blow
to those who love us best.
Saturday, January 08, 2005
It's like being in a state of non-existence. a realm between fantasy and reality. A vacuum. darkness and light at the same time. there's no gravity and i'm floating freely. there's no air but i know i'm breathing. dreams turn into nightmares and nightmares into dreams.
somebody wake me up please.
i'm coughing like a damned bloody pig.
god help me but i cant even sleep well.
somebody wake me up please.
i'm coughing like a damned bloody pig.
god help me but i cant even sleep well.
Thursday, December 30, 2004
"There can be miracles, when you believe."
it is during times like this that the fragility of life hits you squarely in the face. just like that, the illusion of safety is wiped out in the cruelest way possible. it was as if the very fury of god has descended upon the world. lives were extinguished in a matter of minutes. families will never be complete. and think about all the words that these people never had the chance to say.
while people are going through the horrifying process of identifying bodies, some people are thinking of which party to attend. while people are counting bodies, other people will be counting down in the midst of booze and merrymaking. dont get me wrong, i'm all for having a little fun and having a gathering with friends. what i cant stand is those people who seems to be living in their own world and adopt the it-didnt-happen-to-me-so-i-dont-care attitude.
The enormity of the deaths is sobering (it has risen to over 114000). there just isnt a way to correctly describe the mood. on one hand, we all know that we have to move on. on the other, how can we turn a blind eye to all those who are now mourning or still frantically searching for their loved ones? we cant even fathom the hell these people are going through. we have absolutely no right to tell them to move on when there is still something to hold on to.
hold on. no matter how dim that ray of light may be. hold on to it, dont give up till you're proven wrong.
because miracles do happen.
what about you? are there words that are still left unspoken? are u waiting for tomorrow? what are you waiting for? tomorrow might just never come.
i love you
every single one of you
it is during times like this that the fragility of life hits you squarely in the face. just like that, the illusion of safety is wiped out in the cruelest way possible. it was as if the very fury of god has descended upon the world. lives were extinguished in a matter of minutes. families will never be complete. and think about all the words that these people never had the chance to say.
while people are going through the horrifying process of identifying bodies, some people are thinking of which party to attend. while people are counting bodies, other people will be counting down in the midst of booze and merrymaking. dont get me wrong, i'm all for having a little fun and having a gathering with friends. what i cant stand is those people who seems to be living in their own world and adopt the it-didnt-happen-to-me-so-i-dont-care attitude.
The enormity of the deaths is sobering (it has risen to over 114000). there just isnt a way to correctly describe the mood. on one hand, we all know that we have to move on. on the other, how can we turn a blind eye to all those who are now mourning or still frantically searching for their loved ones? we cant even fathom the hell these people are going through. we have absolutely no right to tell them to move on when there is still something to hold on to.
hold on. no matter how dim that ray of light may be. hold on to it, dont give up till you're proven wrong.
because miracles do happen.
what about you? are there words that are still left unspoken? are u waiting for tomorrow? what are you waiting for? tomorrow might just never come.
i love you
every single one of you
Friday, December 17, 2004
These foolish feelings
i happen to read through the past posts and realised the style of writing have evolved till what it is now. kinda like life isnt it? at the start, you're open about everything. trying to share whatever feelings you have with everyone. as the years go by, you start to realise that sometimes sharing everything is just not the way. some things are best remain secrets. so that view festers day after day and in the end, you choose to hide everything in paragraphs of words that only you alone can decipher. but what the heck, i feel comfortable in this insanity. i dont need to justify myself. but i guess this is going to be the most straightforward post i have ever done because i just dont see anyway to 'dramatise' it so to speak. and more importantly, this is actually meant for people to understand.
anyway, i digress.
Onward..
i think it's too late for any apologies now dont you think? there's nothing to forgive anymore. we all learn, one way or another. we are stronger now arent we? i have learnt never to be clingy and needy so that nobody else can fuck me up that badly anymore. so much so that clingy and needy people gives me the goosebumps now. we have all moved on. but looking at where you had moved on to and the drastic changes in you really tears me up. where have the sass and arrogance disappeared to? i hear words from you that i never thought i would hear. it freaks me out.
people say that the most depressing words for both the written and spoken is 'what could have been' and i'm inclined to agree. i cant help but look back on what could have been if you are who you are now. i realised that it wouldnt have worked out either. where is the person that used to drive me up the wall? i fell for the sass. i fell for the arrogance. i fell for the nonchalance. not the you i have trouble accepting now. have all of these disappeared? i really hope not. bring them back, it's somewhere inside you. give it time, you'll be able to move on.
move on, so that i can continue moving on too.
*all too familiar funny feelings are festering once again. it's amazing how you can still fuck me up after all these years.
i happen to read through the past posts and realised the style of writing have evolved till what it is now. kinda like life isnt it? at the start, you're open about everything. trying to share whatever feelings you have with everyone. as the years go by, you start to realise that sometimes sharing everything is just not the way. some things are best remain secrets. so that view festers day after day and in the end, you choose to hide everything in paragraphs of words that only you alone can decipher. but what the heck, i feel comfortable in this insanity. i dont need to justify myself. but i guess this is going to be the most straightforward post i have ever done because i just dont see anyway to 'dramatise' it so to speak. and more importantly, this is actually meant for people to understand.
anyway, i digress.
Onward..
i think it's too late for any apologies now dont you think? there's nothing to forgive anymore. we all learn, one way or another. we are stronger now arent we? i have learnt never to be clingy and needy so that nobody else can fuck me up that badly anymore. so much so that clingy and needy people gives me the goosebumps now. we have all moved on. but looking at where you had moved on to and the drastic changes in you really tears me up. where have the sass and arrogance disappeared to? i hear words from you that i never thought i would hear. it freaks me out.
people say that the most depressing words for both the written and spoken is 'what could have been' and i'm inclined to agree. i cant help but look back on what could have been if you are who you are now. i realised that it wouldnt have worked out either. where is the person that used to drive me up the wall? i fell for the sass. i fell for the arrogance. i fell for the nonchalance. not the you i have trouble accepting now. have all of these disappeared? i really hope not. bring them back, it's somewhere inside you. give it time, you'll be able to move on.
move on, so that i can continue moving on too.
*all too familiar funny feelings are festering once again. it's amazing how you can still fuck me up after all these years.
Wednesday, December 15, 2004
was watching a shania twain (i've almost forgotten how sexy she is) dvd when the backstreet boys appeared as guest performers. suddenly i realised that i was quite a boy band fan back in those secondary school days. i know i know, some of the boy bands were real cheesy and cant really hold a tune. 5ive anybody? but there were bands that were real good. boyz 2 men, take that, westlife, n'sync and of course the backstreet boys just to name a few.
although brian is the one who have the best vocals among them, i used to like kevin. cuz i think he's handsome and cool. you know when a girl says a guy is cute it means one thing but when a guy says another guy is cute...
go figure.
moving on, i thought about the songs i liked from every boyband and surprisingly the list just grows on and on. Here are some of them:
take that - back for good
boyz 2 men - 4 seasons of loneliness
the moffatts - misery
hanson - i will come to you
another level - from the heart
n'sync - tearing up my heart
westlife - if your heart's not in it
savage garden (not a boyband but still) - moon and back
human nature - cruel
A1 - everytime
98 degrees - I do
and finally my most favouritest of all from the Backstreet Boys (who else duh?)
All I Have To Give
I don't know what he does to make you cry
But I'll be there to make you smile
I don't have a fancy car
To get to you I'd walk a thousand miles
I don't care if he buys you nice things
Does his gifts come from the heart?
I don't know
But if you were my girl
I'd make it so we'd never be apart
[Chorus:]
But my love is all I have to give
Without you I don't think I could live
I wish I could give the world to you
But love is all I have to give
When you talk does it seem like he's not
Even listening to a word you say?
That's okay babe, just tell me your problems
I'll try my best to kiss them all away
Does he leave (does he leave) when you need him the most?
Does his friends get all your time?
Baby pleaseI'm on my knees
Praying for the day that you'll be mine
[Bridge:]
hey girl, I don't want you to cry no more inside
All the money in the world could never add up to all the loveI have inside...
I love you
And I will give it to you
All I can give, all I can give
Everything I have is for you
But love is all I have to give
[Chorus (3x)]
although brian is the one who have the best vocals among them, i used to like kevin. cuz i think he's handsome and cool. you know when a girl says a guy is cute it means one thing but when a guy says another guy is cute...
go figure.
moving on, i thought about the songs i liked from every boyband and surprisingly the list just grows on and on. Here are some of them:
take that - back for good
boyz 2 men - 4 seasons of loneliness
the moffatts - misery
hanson - i will come to you
another level - from the heart
n'sync - tearing up my heart
westlife - if your heart's not in it
savage garden (not a boyband but still) - moon and back
human nature - cruel
A1 - everytime
98 degrees - I do
and finally my most favouritest of all from the Backstreet Boys (who else duh?)
All I Have To Give
I don't know what he does to make you cry
But I'll be there to make you smile
I don't have a fancy car
To get to you I'd walk a thousand miles
I don't care if he buys you nice things
Does his gifts come from the heart?
I don't know
But if you were my girl
I'd make it so we'd never be apart
[Chorus:]
But my love is all I have to give
Without you I don't think I could live
I wish I could give the world to you
But love is all I have to give
When you talk does it seem like he's not
Even listening to a word you say?
That's okay babe, just tell me your problems
I'll try my best to kiss them all away
Does he leave (does he leave) when you need him the most?
Does his friends get all your time?
Baby pleaseI'm on my knees
Praying for the day that you'll be mine
[Bridge:]
hey girl, I don't want you to cry no more inside
All the money in the world could never add up to all the loveI have inside...
I love you
And I will give it to you
All I can give, all I can give
Everything I have is for you
But love is all I have to give
[Chorus (3x)]
Wednesday, December 08, 2004
i remember
a long time ago
you and me
at the crossroads
eyes locked
unspoken words linger
achingly
in the air
one deep breath
and i'm gone
walking down the road
that is so different
from yours
now
your distress
haunt me
and i falter
your tears
they touch me
and i feel myself
going back
to the place
where we've swore
never to visit
ever again
i see cracks
in you
at places
that never
existed before
cracks
that never
should
have been there
what happened
to the person
i used to
know?
what happened
to the person
i have come
to miss?
wipe away
the tears
so that
my footsteps can
be steady again
be back
who you were
so that
i can walk away
if not for
anything else
then do it
for me
for me
because you owe me that
*wish i could be, every little thing you wanted..
a long time ago
you and me
at the crossroads
eyes locked
unspoken words linger
achingly
in the air
one deep breath
and i'm gone
walking down the road
that is so different
from yours
now
your distress
haunt me
and i falter
your tears
they touch me
and i feel myself
going back
to the place
where we've swore
never to visit
ever again
i see cracks
in you
at places
that never
existed before
cracks
that never
should
have been there
what happened
to the person
i used to
know?
what happened
to the person
i have come
to miss?
wipe away
the tears
so that
my footsteps can
be steady again
be back
who you were
so that
i can walk away
if not for
anything else
then do it
for me
for me
because you owe me that
*wish i could be, every little thing you wanted..
Friday, December 03, 2004
The games that people play
It is fascinating to see us constantly and willingly subject ourselves to emotional vulnerabilty. we degrade ourselves to the point where a single word can send us to the dizzying heights of heaven or bring us crashing thorugh the abyss of hell. we know this but do we really comprehend it? we are granting another person direct access to the depths of our soul. with nothing but just a look, they dictate our emotions and manipulate our feelings according to their whim and fancy. we have literally sold our souls to them.
If you're with me give me a silent nod here.
but for what? just so we can be stuck in relationships we refuse to get out because we have invested too much in it? or do whatever to please the person you have the hots for and be the perfect wussy? or continuing to pine for someone when you know damn well you should just move on? so once again, for what?
isnt it high time we learn to reconginse the signs and cut our losses before everything gets out of hand?
afterall, its a game we all play.
It is fascinating to see us constantly and willingly subject ourselves to emotional vulnerabilty. we degrade ourselves to the point where a single word can send us to the dizzying heights of heaven or bring us crashing thorugh the abyss of hell. we know this but do we really comprehend it? we are granting another person direct access to the depths of our soul. with nothing but just a look, they dictate our emotions and manipulate our feelings according to their whim and fancy. we have literally sold our souls to them.
If you're with me give me a silent nod here.
but for what? just so we can be stuck in relationships we refuse to get out because we have invested too much in it? or do whatever to please the person you have the hots for and be the perfect wussy? or continuing to pine for someone when you know damn well you should just move on? so once again, for what?
isnt it high time we learn to reconginse the signs and cut our losses before everything gets out of hand?
afterall, its a game we all play.
Wednesday, November 24, 2004
i have always found the process of parenthood mentally intimidating. the babies and toddlers are fine. they are adorable and easy to handle even if it means having to change the diapers and wake up in the middle of the night. it is what happens after that stage which is terrifying. when they start to learn how to lie and hide stuff. then you have to constantly outhink, outfox and outmaneuver them. i know what they do are elementary stuff cuz we all have been there and done that. but sometimes dont u wish that we could just install the basic disciplines into their brain to save us all the anguish? then they'll do their homework without you having to sit beside them. you dont have to watch for body language if you suspect them of lying. if all these features are in place, wont parenting be a breeze?
sometimes we focus too much on the big picture and lose interest on the little things. sometimes, it's the little details that mean more. it might be anything from that little sigh, the fleeting glance or that one little word. and when you make someone's day because you paid more attention. that feeling is beyond explanation.
It's priceless.
*we dance for laughter, we dance for tears. we dance for madness, we dance for fears. we dance for hope, we dance for screams. we are the dancers, we create the dreams.
sometimes we focus too much on the big picture and lose interest on the little things. sometimes, it's the little details that mean more. it might be anything from that little sigh, the fleeting glance or that one little word. and when you make someone's day because you paid more attention. that feeling is beyond explanation.
It's priceless.
*we dance for laughter, we dance for tears. we dance for madness, we dance for fears. we dance for hope, we dance for screams. we are the dancers, we create the dreams.
Wednesday, November 17, 2004
One more try
Why weren't we able
To see the signs that we missed
And try to turn the tables?
Now the story's played out like this
Just like a paperback novel
Lets rewrite an ending that fits
Instead of a hollywood horror
*how the hell did it end up like this?
"dont change for the sake of changing, change because you really want to."
Why weren't we able
To see the signs that we missed
And try to turn the tables?
Now the story's played out like this
Just like a paperback novel
Lets rewrite an ending that fits
Instead of a hollywood horror
*how the hell did it end up like this?
"dont change for the sake of changing, change because you really want to."
Tuesday, November 16, 2004
Allow me to be frank
finally, i have reached the conclusion that as people get older, their ability to tolerate their own personal embarassment increases. in other words, they have became so thick skin that nothing embarasses them. before this conclusion, i used to be in conflict with myself. i mean arent adults supposed to be the epitome of graciousness and courtesy so that the younger generation (ie. me) can learn from thier exemplary behaviour? yeah right.
but no. graciousness and even basic common sense do not exist in the dictionaries of adults aka aunties. i was as usual standing in front of the door waiting for the train. when it arrived, i stepped aside for the alighting the passengers. but surprise surprise! the two aunties behind moved to stand in front of the door when i steppd aside. i mean they must have balls made of brass (i know i know, they are aunties but still) to be able to do that and not be embarrassed. everybody was looking at them and they have the gall to nonchalantly continue talking. i was staring at one of them. hell i was glaring at her. i mean if eyes could kill, they would've been dead 10 times over. i mean gimme a break, if you were there first, of course you can stand in front. but bloody hell, you were the last ones and you bloody damn well understand the word 'Queue'! i could have strangled them. old adults these days. what a big DISGRACE.
oh well, on a lighter note i walked past Hooters today. and oh boy.. thats all i have to say. i know i said its not always about the Ts & the As. but well..
sometimes its all abt the Ts & As.
"how can i find peace when you keep coming back? stop playing this game of see-saw with my heart."
finally, i have reached the conclusion that as people get older, their ability to tolerate their own personal embarassment increases. in other words, they have became so thick skin that nothing embarasses them. before this conclusion, i used to be in conflict with myself. i mean arent adults supposed to be the epitome of graciousness and courtesy so that the younger generation (ie. me) can learn from thier exemplary behaviour? yeah right.
but no. graciousness and even basic common sense do not exist in the dictionaries of adults aka aunties. i was as usual standing in front of the door waiting for the train. when it arrived, i stepped aside for the alighting the passengers. but surprise surprise! the two aunties behind moved to stand in front of the door when i steppd aside. i mean they must have balls made of brass (i know i know, they are aunties but still) to be able to do that and not be embarrassed. everybody was looking at them and they have the gall to nonchalantly continue talking. i was staring at one of them. hell i was glaring at her. i mean if eyes could kill, they would've been dead 10 times over. i mean gimme a break, if you were there first, of course you can stand in front. but bloody hell, you were the last ones and you bloody damn well understand the word 'Queue'! i could have strangled them. old adults these days. what a big DISGRACE.
oh well, on a lighter note i walked past Hooters today. and oh boy.. thats all i have to say. i know i said its not always about the Ts & the As. but well..
sometimes its all abt the Ts & As.
"how can i find peace when you keep coming back? stop playing this game of see-saw with my heart."